


Scared to Love You

by Mrs_Padalackles



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Apologies, Confessions, Cuddling, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fights, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I Tried, I'm Bad At Tagging, I'm Sorry, Injury, Insecurity, Insults, Love, Love Confessions, Reader-Insert, Sleepy Cuddles
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-03-15
Updated: 2016-03-15
Packaged: 2018-05-26 21:12:49
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,283
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6256081
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Mrs_Padalackles/pseuds/Mrs_Padalackles
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean says something he doesn't mean after a hunt that really hurts you, fluff ensues</p><p> </p><p>~DISCLAIMER~ I do not own supernatural or any of the characters</p>
            </blockquote>





	Scared to Love You

**Author's Note:**

> hello! this is my very first fic ever! its probably not the best but I had fun writing it and hopefully at least one person will have fun reading it :) constructive criticism is welcome as long as its something that will help me improve not just something to try and bring me down, ENJOY (:
> 
> WARNINGS: Language I suppose

you know he didn't mean it, lord knows he apologized enough. it still really hurt though and you couldn't seem to rip the thoughts out of your mind. There was still a small part of you that thought 'maybe hes right, maybe they'd be better off if I wasn't here to drag them down, I'm nothing but a burden' and with that you couldn't help but replay the days events over again in your head.

It all began in the abandoned warehouse where you were taking out a small vamp nest, it ended up being quite a bit bigger than any of you had expected. It was a rough fight and there were only a few of the monsters left to take care of when one lunged at you, teeth barred, hands out ready to grip you by the neck and watch the life trickle out of your eyes but you were able to behead the bastard before he got his hands on you. The only problem was you didn't notice the vamp behind you and she was able to grab you. She slammed your head into the concrete floor hard enough to hear a sickening thud echo throughout the large building but not hard enough to render you completely unconscious. 

you were drifting in and out of consciousness but you were still aware enough of your surroundings to register that Sam had just taken out the bitch that got you and he ran to your side.

"Y/N? hey, hey look up at me! everything's okay everything's gonna be fine"

It wasn't until then that you noticed the warm blood pooling on the floor under your head where you had made initial contact with the cold unforgiving floor. you couldn't quite make out his words, everything sounded like it was underwater and try as you might you couldn't shake away the clouds that were fogging up your mind.

"sam, i jus, i c-cant"

you weren't entirely sure what you were even trying to say, you couldn't think and even if you did know what you were trying to say everything was coming out incoherent and slurred. The next thing you knew Dean was running up to the both of you looking worried and paniced. He slid his arms under you and next thing you knew you were out cold.

~~~~~~~~~~~

When you woke up you were laying in the back of the impala with a headache unlike anything you have ever experienced, you thought for sure you would pass out from the pain. You reached up and gently placed your hand where your head made contact with the floor to find a few stitches on your forehead right below your hair line. They must have patched you up before they started driving back to the bunker. After laying in silence for about twenty minutes you felt well enough to sit up, when you looked into the mirror in the front you met Sams soft sympathetic eyes but when you met Deans they were not nearly as comforting. his jaw was clenched and his eyes looked hard and cold. You shrank back in your seat knowing he was going to be pissed that you let a vamp get the jump on you

"How are you feeling Y/N?" Sam looked back at you giving you a sympathetic smile.

"Better now I think" he reached back and handed you a bottle of water and some extra strength pain killers. You were dreading when Dean spoke up because you knew it would only lead to a fight and you hated fighting with Dean. You had slowly fallen in love with the green eyed hunter, something you never wanted to do, especially since love and hunting always ended horribly and with every fight you felt like you had even less of a chance with him. 

Not that you ever really had a chance with him to begin with. He was strong, smart, caring, and one of the sexiest men you'd ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on. How could you even compare? you could tell he was holding back everything he wanted to say and it was only a matter of time before he couldn't anymore.

"Y/N what the hell happened back there?"

"Dean can we not do this right now?" a fight was the last thing you wanted at the moment

"No, we can talk about this now and you can explain to me how the hell you managed to get your skull bashed in!" Sam was sinking down in his seat, he was just as familiar with yours and deans fights as you were and he mostly tried to stay out of them.

"Its not my fault dean! I was busy trying to kill the vamp that was in front of my trying to rip out my damn throat and she snuck up behind me!"

"Well then pay better attention god damn it! You're a hunter, it shouldn't be that easy for something to jump you like that for fucks sake!"

"Dean just leave me alone about it! I already feel shitty enough for messing up and you're not helping!" he rubbed his hand down getting visibly agitated before speaking up again but this time louder and with a more harsh tone. 

"well maybe you should feel like shit! You're so fucking stupid, I swear to God maybe you shouldn't even be a hunter! You're so damn useless! You're about as much help to us as much as a six year old!"

Silence fell over the car and you looked up at dean with pained eyes, tears threatening to spill over. he had taken one of your greatest insecurities and used it against you. A day never went by with out you feeling inadequate and worrying that you were just a burden to them and now your worst fears had just been confirmed.

"Dean!" Sam bellowed his name and gave him a look of anger you had never seen on the younger Winchesters features. Deans face went pale when the reality of what he had said and the pain it must have caused you sank in and he looked back at you with regret etched into his features.

"Y-Y/N I....I am-" you interrupted him before he could continue because if he said one more thing you knew you were sure to burst out in tears and you hated crying in front of them.

"Dean just stop, not right now!" you tried to keep your voice steady but a sob was threatening to rip itself from your throat

"Y/N plea-"

"DEAN I SAID NOT NOW!" You knew it was silly to be reacting so badly but it was taking all of your effort to keep in your cries and not show how much it hurt you. Sam and Dean meant the world to you so to hear dean say how little you meant to them hurt worse than any injury you had sustained on the hunt 

after pulling up to the bunker you were the first to jump out. You wasted no time in grabbing your bag and rushing towards your room before Sam or Dean could say anything to you. That's how you ended up curled under your blankets trying desperately not to let the sobs you'd been holding in for the past 2 hours wrack your body and keep the tears from rolling down your face.

"He didn't mean it, he was just so caught up in the fight, he was angry, we all say things we don't mean when we're mad and he would never use any of my fears against me" these were the thoughts you were trying to occupy your mind with but you couldn't help but find yourself agreeing with everything he had said to you.

You heard a soft tap at the door and tried your best to pull yourself together "Y/N are you in there?"

"y-yea dean i'm i-in here" you mentally cursed yourself for sounding so broken up

"can we talk?" there was a long pause

"yea sure...you can come in"

dean opened the door slowly an cautiously opened poked his head around the door while you sat up straight.

while you were lost in your thoughts once again he approached your bed and sat next to you "Y/N"he paused like he was thinking of what to say when he reached down and grabbed your hand which caught you off guard. It felt like there was an electrical current surging through your hand where he was touching you and after what seemed like an eternity he looked straight into your eyes and spoke up again. 

"I need you to know that I didn't mean a single thing I said in the car. I couldn't stand seeing you on that warehouse floor looking so fragile and broken and it kinda messed with me. I think i was just pissed at myself for letting you get hurt"

"Dean it wasn't your fa-"

"Y/N please just let me talk because I have a lot more to say than you think and if I back out one more time I might snap" what the hell was he talking about?

"okay"

"I was angry at myself for letting you get hurt and when I opened my damn mouth everything I was feeling about myself was projected onto you and I need you to know not a single word of it was true. God you don't even know how much I need you to know this. You are absolutely incredible and I have no idea what Sam and I would do with out you, lord knows you've saved my ass enough times"

you couldn't exactly tell where Dean was going with all of this but you just let him talk, you knew what a hard time he had with words and he was trying with everything he had in him to convey how much you meant to him and you couldn't help but let a small smile creep onto your face while he was talking and holding both of your hands in his.

"Y/N you mean more to me than you will ever know" he now had your hands in a vice grip like he was afraid you would float away if he let go. "I guess once I saw you on that damn floor and realized how much you mean to me it scarred and did what every Winchester does when he cares too much about someone and I tried to push you away. once I said those words I pulled my head out of my ass and realized that I cant do that to you, i need you too much and I am so sorry."

Your head was filled with everything he had just said, did you really mean that much to him? You had no idea. He had never really told you how much he cared about you.

"I don't just care about you though, it goes past that. The reason I got so scared and tried to push you away i-is..because..Y/N i'm in love with you"

butterflies erupted in your belly and your heart rate soared, no one had ever had the same impact on you that Dean did and he had just said he loved you!

"It took me long enough to realize it but I am, I love the way you scrunch up your nose when your frustrated, I love when you wrap your arms around my neck every single morning to hug me, I love watching you curl up on the couch to read in a messy bun with out makeup, and i'm just completely in love with you and I know I hate chick flick moments but I had to make an exception"

it took you a good five minutes to register everything he had just said and it probably would taken you longer if Dean hadn't cleared his throat nervously 

"so uhhh...can you say something cause I kinda just confessed my love for you"

"Dean" you threw your arms around his neck sending him toppling backwards onto the bed so that you were on top of him with your arms still around him and his arms around your waist

"you should've said something sooner!"

there was no use in hiding your excitement, Dean Winchester loved you.

"So does that mean you feel the same way?" he said with a slightly awkward tone in his voice

"Yes you dope! I love you!" he wrapped his arms tighter around you. the feeling of being in his arms, taking in his scent of leather and gun powder with his cologne was more comforting than you could've ever imagined.

He rolled you off of him so that you were laying next to him with his arms around you and your head rested on your chest he looked down into your Y/E/C eyes and leaned in close to you before pressing his lips firmly against yours. The kiss was slow and intense and the feeling of being so close to him was electric. He pulled away all too soon and spoke again.

"I was so scared when I saw you in that floor. I cant loose you you" 

you reached up and pressed your hand to his cheek feeling the rough tickle of his stubble beneath you palm

"You won't loose me Dean"

he leaned down and softly kissed your forehead, the next thing you knew you were drifting off into a peaceful sleep in his arms with him running his fingers through your hair and listening to his steady heart beat.

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, that's all folks! sorry if it wasn't very good :| at least I tried! I look forward to hearing what you think and any advice anyone may have, thank you for reading!


End file.
